Saturday, August 16, 2008

Starting a family

Our friends had a baby six weeks ago and she is the most precious little girl I have ever seen. Ever since then Ben and I have discussed when we are going to start a family. We really really want to right now but he wants to be here for the birth and if we were to get pregnant right now he would be in Afganistan when the baby would be born. He also wants to be here for the whole pregnancy and I want him to be here also. It just really sucks because we have to wait two years from now to try to start a family. It is okay though because we are both not 21 yet and I don't want to be pregnant when I turn 21 and I don't want to have the baby without him here. So for now we are just going to babysit Libby and all of our other baby friends and family members!! We also like having the time to ourselves too! So, we know what the smart thing to do is, and we are going to do it. We just can't wait for two years to get here already!

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

The hardest night of my life

On Sunday, August 10th I had to leave Tennessee to move back to Missouri for my interview on Monday. Well.. Let's just say im back in TN right now until Sunday the 17th. The 10th was the hardest night of my life. I couldnt stop crying at all that night and almost about made myself sick from crying all night. It was worse than the day that Ben left to go to Basic Training. I had never felt so alone in my life. I missed him soo much. So on Monday after I got done running all of my errands in town and got done with my interview, I decided to suprise Ben and come back down for the week. I left Missouri around four in the afternoon and got down here around 10:30 that night. I knocked on the door and when he opened the door I yelled "SUPRISE" He had no idea I was coming back!!! It was amazing!! I gave him the longest hug ever. I know that it's going to hurt again on Sunday when I leave but I now know what to expect. I just hope I can get thru him leaving to go overseas. That is going to be the hardest thing that I ever do in my life. As for now I am going to enjoy this week with my husband and then just take it a day at a time!

Thursday, August 7, 2008

I'm going to miss him

Our marriage is not like other marriages. When you get married you usually live with them for the rest of your life. Not so much with me and my husband. I leave on Sunday the 10th to move back to Missouri to finish my last semester of school. I thought about transferring but the last time I did that it screwed up my credits so with one semester left Ben and I both decided that it would be the more wise decision to move back to MO and finish school. So while I am back in MO finishing school my husband will still be down here in Tennessee. By the time I graduate from college Ben will be overseas. All we know is that he is leaving sometime before the holidays. I really dont want him to go but there is nothing we can do about it. I am very proud of him though and support him 110% with whatever he does. So starting on Sunday, Ben and I wont get to live together for another year and a half. We are used to long distance relationships so it shouldnt be that hard on us but I will still miss him terribly. I have gotten used to living with him these last two months and Im not ready to let that go. I will be strong and so will he and when he gets back from overseas we can finally re-start our lives together. We plan on getting a house, and having a family all starting as soon as he gets back!! Wish us luck in this long journey ahead of us. Pray that he makes it home safe!!