Thursday, December 25, 2008

Merry Christmas!!!

Hello all! Good news.... I GOT TO TALK TO BEN LAST NIGHT (xmas eve). We talked for about 2 hours!! I needed that so much! He is doing really well. He is finally in his own room where he has built up his bed and desk and what not! They all got stockings yesterday and Bens had candy and the move "Up A Creek Without A Paddle" in it. He was excited! He looked really good last night too! I am still just glowing because I finally got to see him!!!!! Below is the email that I sent out to everyone about him:
"Merry Christmas everyone!
I got to talk to Ben last night for a good two hours!!! AND I got to see him on the web-cam!!! I loved it!! He is where he is supposed to be now that starts with a "s" (cant say specifics over the Internet or phone). He says he likes it much better there than the other place he was at that starts with a "b". He also says its warmer there as well. Its about 35 degrees in the morning and about 60 degrees during the day, where the other place was 20 degrees during the day, so

huge difference. He has finally gotten into his room. It's 8x8 so not very big but he got to built his bed so he made it up top with his TV and desk underneath the bed and his door to get out of his little room slides. Its really cool! They all got stockings this year.. Ben got candy in his and the movie "Up A Creek Without A Paddle" He was watching it last night (his morning). He is 10.5 hours ahead of us so right now it is around 8:20pm Christmas night there since it is 9:50am here. He does have Internet now so he should be able to email everyone more regularly. He will be out on missions alot so he might not. He's not quit sure yet since either today or tomorrow is his last day of processing. Other than all of that he is doing good. He looks good too (im a little bias though) lol haha just kidding. Ive attached some pictures that I took of him last night with the web-cam. There are a few of his room. One is of his bed and the other of his TV area.

I am doing good as well. Christmas is a little hard but I'll get through it. I leave for Florida today, but when I get back I am going to mail Ben some stuff so I will collect stuff from people if you like. I was going to mail him something and make sure it got there before everyone mails him something and it all comes back to us. He gave me is address last night but if we all remember what basic was like... it could be the wrong one! lol haha (don't tell him i said that, he will kill me! lol) jk.

Well I hope everyone has a Merry Christmas! I gotta finish packing and head to the airport!!!
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year."
(I was too lazy to type all that again!!) lol

I hope everyone has a Merry Christmas!! Below are pictures I took last night of Ben and his room!
{wavin bye to me last night}

{His Bed}

{The note he made me}

{ His TV area. The ladder you see goes up to his bed}

Monday, December 22, 2008

One week gone...

This past weekend I had more fun that I thought I would seeing that it was my first weekend without Ben. Central Bank's Christmas Party was this weekend and all I have to say is that I was feeling mighty fine that night! ;) Some interesting things ended up happening that night but we won't go into detail. They were quit funny though! lol haha.

Anyways, tomorrow makes one week since I said "See ya lata" to Ben. I must say though that the time has gone pretty fast. I am trying to keep myself busy and with being away from home for 2.5 weeks I had alot to do when I got back. Plus I am leaving Christmas Day to go to Disney World!!!!! I'm so excited! I can't wait!

I got to talk to Ben today on the phone for the first time!! I was so glad to hear his voice. I am missing him so much but knowing that he is okay and safe makes me feel ten times better. I can't give details of what's going on with him for his safety but he is doing fine. He says it's hard being away from me for our first Christmas has a married couple but when he gets back it will be that much better. We talked online for the first few nights he was gone and then we would email but until he gets into his room and gets Internet I probably won't get to talk to him again (that should only be a few more days though). I am still just so happy that he called.

It's weird too now that Ben is deployed because I don't take anything for granted like I used too. I mean I never really took spending time with him for granted but how I look at everything is different. I cherish every moment I get on the phone or Internet with him. I will drop whatever I am doing to talk to him. It is hard seeing other couples together and so happy because Ben isn't with me right now but I know that our love is much stronger because we have to go through this. I just really don't like it when people complain because they don't get to see their gf/bf/wife/husband that much when they either live with them or live in the same town as them. I just wish I could trade them places for one week so they could see just how lucky they really are. Oh well I guess.

Well I'm going to end this. Ill post again after I get back from Disney World!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to everyone. (enjoy the pics from the party)

Sunday, December 14, 2008

They Changed Their Minds Again

{Our Name Thingy!}

Well... Ben didn't leave on Friday night. They told him Tuesday about leaving on Friday night and then on Wednesday when he went to work they told him that he is now leaving the 16th real early in the morning again. I am thanking God that he answered my prayers and letting me have a few more days with my husband. So while I have been down here we have gone to Nashville twice now, once with Dustin and Stacey, and last night with my step mom, Cheryl, her boyfriend, Jack, and Ben's dad, Wally. We had alot of fun. We went and ate at the Rainforest Cafe inside the Opry Mills Mall and then after that we went to the Opryland Hotel to look at their Christmas lights. It is so pretty in there. If I could have gotten married in there I would have done it in a heartbeat! If you ever go to Nashville, I HIGHLY recommend going and looking around the inside of this hotel. After that we drove downtown. Cheryl and Jack stopped and got something to drink and Me, Ben, and Wally drove around so Wally could see where B.B. Kings is and all the famous bars and the Hall of Fame, then we drove back home. Nashville is a really neat place. But it can end up being like Jeff City after you have been there too many times except for the fact that there is way more clubs and things to do in downtown Nashville compared to Jefferson City. lol
{Me in Ben's bullet proof vest}
So here we are, Sunday afternoon, I'm writing this and Ben and his dad are playing the Xbox. Tomorrow is Ben's last day here and tonight is our last night together since we are going to stay up tomorrow night since he has to be to base so early. I'm not quite sure how I'm going to take all of this. It is going to be so hard, but I have a friend, Amanda, whose husband, Rich, has already been over for a month and when I talked to her last she said that it does get easier with time and she was sounding a whole lot better than I thought she would, so I'm looking up to her and hopefully I will be the same way. I am just going to keep myself busy and make the time fly by.
{Ben and Libby}

Well.. that's all I really have to say for now. Enjoy the pictures from our night out on the town and our time down here together! Happy Holidays!!!

{Me and Ben at Rainforest Cafe}

{Ben and his dad}

{Me and My Step mom, Cheryl}

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

The Army

Well.. what can I say? It's the United States Army. We were told, and have it on paper that Ben was supposed to be deploying the 14th of December to go overseas. Well, this morning we get a phone call and got told that his flight was pushed up to the 13th and that it's really early in the morning. ( I cant give specific dates, times, or locations for his safety). I broke down right then and there and just started bawling. I know that he has to go over but it is just not fair that they take a whole day and a half away from us the week of his deployment. I think that if they are going to do this kind of stuff once it is on paper it should be final. I mean we had made plans for family to come down and everything and now it is all messed up. IDK. I know the whole Army life and that you should never take anything they say seriously until last minute because they change their mind all the time and when you get your hopes up for something it always comes crashing down in front of you.
I just can't believe that he is leaving in a few days. I know that everything is going to be okay and he is going to come back home to me but it still sucks knowing that I won't get to lay next to him in bed, snuggle with him, give him kisses or hugs or anything for a whole year. It is really depressing but I have some big plans for while he is gone. Our neighbor down here is going overseas as well so me and his wife, Stacey, and their daughter, Libby, are going to be living together in IL, where they are from, while our husbands are gone. Also for my 21st bday I plan on jumping out of a plane and then the day after that one of my really really good friends gets married, then its my birthday, then my nephews one year birthday party, then Ben will get to come home for 15 days for mid tour and during those 15 days we will hopefully get to celebrate our one year wedding anniversary. Also while he is gone I am going to learn how to cook alot better, like gourmet meals and what not. I watch the Food network channel all the time and I love it! I graduate college this Friday so I wont have that to keep me busy so I thought this would be a good thing to keep me busy with! Also I will have Stacey and Libby to keep my company as well!
Well I'm done rambling for now. Please, again, keep Ben in your prayers and all of our other soldiers that are already over and are going over to fight for our country! God Bless and Happy Holidays!

Saturday, November 29, 2008

2 weeks and counting...

Well I had s good Thanksgiving for the most part. It is my favorite holiday because of all the good food and not everyone is so greedy with presents like they are for Christmas. Me and Ben did the whole Black Friday thing and went to Walmart at 4am and got our first Christmas tree for $25 and a 6 piece luggage set for only $44! We were pretty excited! We then went to Kohl's and I got a few things to decorate our house with for when Ben gets back from Afghanistan.
Speaking of Afghanistan Ben deploys in a little over two weeks. For the most part I have been telling myself that the time is aways away and it will come slowly. Not quite sure who I was trying to kid. Now that Thanksgiving is over the time seems to just keep going and going and going like the energizer battery. I wish those batteries would die so that time would slow down just a little bit. It is just weird to think that for Christmas, our first Christmas together since we have been married, he won't be here. I gave him his present last night and I could tell that it touched him deeply. Thank you to all of those who helped make it as special as it is. He said that when he was looking at it he couldn't believe that he was actually going over. I guess the book reminded him that he really is going. He keeps telling himself that he is only going to be gone for a few weeks. I hope that it only feels like a couple of weeks but I know that is not going to be the case. I did tell him last night though, that a few things he could focus on while is was over is that when he gets back we can get a new puppy like he wants and start a family. I know that will help him over there, it will help me while I'm here waiting for him. I have never done anything this hard in my life and I'm not looking forward to it either. But I know that we can do it. We are both strong people and our love for each other is even stronger. Just like I told him.. I could not ask God for a better best friend and I am glad that he had a part in me and Ben falling in love. I am honored to be Ben's wife and even more honored to be an American Soldier's wife! I could not be more proud of him for what he is doing. He is my number one hero and will always be.
Well I guess I'll quit rambling on for now. I will keep everyone updated on how he is doing over there and what all is going on. I am leaving on Wednesday (12-3-08) to go down to TN and spend two weeks with him before he leaves. Please keep Ben in your prayers this holiday season and for the whole time he is over there. I will be praying everyday for him to be safe and come home soon! I love you Ben!

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Busy Busy Busy!!!

I feel like my head has been spinning for two weeks straight now. With everything going on with finishing up school and Ben deploying I don't have time to do anything else! I am almost done with school though! Only two more weeks left and Im done for the rest of my life!! I cannot wait! I was a little hesitant about coming back for this fall semester knowing the Ben was going to be deploying as soon as I was done or even before. I almost stayed down in TN to spend time with him but we both agreed that it made more since and it was the smarter choice for me to come back up to MO and finish my college education. I am so glad that we decided that! Im not saying it hasnt been hard but it has def. been worth it! Now with his deployment.. that's a different story. We were told that it would be around the 16th of December then it got pushed up to the 1st of December. Now we finally have it in writting that he is leaving Sunday December 14th. :( Not really a day I am looking forward to but it is something that most of us Army Wives have to go through. That is the vow we took when we married our solider! I must say thought that I would not trade this life for anything! I love my life!
Ben does get to come home for Thanksgiving! He will be home Wednesday and leaves on Sunday! Im super excited! We are celebrating our Christmas while he is here! I leave the 3rd of December to go down to TN until the 16th to see him off and finish packing all of our stuff down there. I'll come back to work on the 17th to get my mind off of everything and that next weekend (the 20th) is the Central Bank Xmas party and Im def going to that to have some fun! Christmas day im leaving to go to Florida to see Mickey and Minni for a whole week! Im excited! I wish Ben could go but in honor of him I am designing a shirt to wear while I am down there that has a prayer on the back of it for him with our picture and then on the front it says "Half of my heart is in Afghanistan" with the same heart that is on the back on the front just with his picture in it!
Well I think im done rambling on for now! Have a Happy Thanksgiving!!!

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Braylon Von

My cousin Erica gave birth to her third child yesterday morning! Braylen Von was welcomed into the world at 8:28am yesterday!!! I went and saw him today and he is just the cutest little
thing!! He has a big brother and a big sister waiting for him to come home and play! My cousin and the baby are both doing good. Hopefully she gets to go home tomorrow!
Well I just wanted to say Congrats to my cousin and post some pics of the cutie!!

Tuesday, October 28, 2008


I went to my first ever Mizzou game on Saturday which was their homecoming game. That was freaking amazing. They kicked Colorado's ass 58-0! It was a little cold but it was totally worth it. When we got there we tailgated for awhile with some friends and then went into the stadium. We found our seats and then went and saw our friend Danielle at the Mizzou store. We got some tiger ears for me and some decals for our car! Thanks Danielle! I was just in aww the entire time I was in the stadium. It was sooo neat! hehe

Anyways after the game we went back to town and got all dressed up for a halloween party. My favorite costumes there were Cassandra's and Val's. They were gnomes!!

Sunday we got our first ever family portraits taken by one of Ben's family friends, Pam. She did such an amazing job. I had so much fun. The link to go and look at them is: There will be more up later once she edits some of them. I can't wait!! I love them all already!

Well I know this one was a little short but I have to run off to class!! Enjoy the pics!

{Rochelle, Jake, Laurenn, Me, and Ben (we couldnt find Cassandra)}

more pics to come...

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

This past weekend..

Man, O man were we busy this past weekend. We had alot of fun though. Saturday was Ben's predeployment party. We had a really good turn out! There was alot of food too! Ben knew about the party but I wanted some of it to be a suprise so I ordered him a "See ya later" cake with a transforming tank on the top of it! He really liked it. To make things even better, our friends Dustin, Stacey, and Libby came up on Thursday and stayed all weekend long. I havn't seen them since I moved back up to MO. It was just amazing to see how much Libby has grown in two months. We all had alot of fun. Saturday, my friend Erica brought her new puppy, Luci, with her and Matt to the party! Let me tell you, besides Rascal of course, she is the cutest little thing I have ever seen. I wanted to keep her but I dont think I would have gotten away with it :)

I am just so glad he is home. I love fallin asleep in his arms everynight and waking up with him next to me every morning. Im trying not to get used to it but man is it hard. lol Monday night, after I got off at News Tribune, we went out to dinner with his mom and sister who were in from Alaska, and his aunt and uncle at Applebees. It was really good to see his mom again. After we left there he took me to the Holiday Inn and told me to come up to the room in ten min. So after ten minutes I went upstairs and opened the door.. he had gotten us the excutive sweet and had lined the hallway with candles that went into the bathroom where the jetted tub was lined with candles and a big vanilla scented candle!!! It was so romantic! I fell in love with him all over
again!!! It was nice to be away from my dads house, and from everything else and just relax and enjoy our time together! I don't know what I am going to do when he is gone. I am going to miss him so much. I still have two months until he leaves so I am going to make the best out of every day! I love you so much babe!!
Well I better end this... off to the attorneys office to get Power of Attorney and then off to make our will! Wish us luck! lol


{Miss Liberty Mae}

{Some of the McHugh's}

{The Ushmans}

{Matt, Erica, Katy, Rachelle, Luci}

{The Peters}

{The Bathroom}

{What was at the end of the candle lit hallway}

{After our bath!}

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Hartsburg Pumpkin Fest

This is one of the reasons why I love the season of Fall! The Hartsburg Pumpkin Fest as been a tradition for me, my aunt Debbie, and my cousin Erica to go to for quite some time now. My aunt Debbie and uncle Glen used to take me and my sister when we were little also! Anywho.. Debbie, Erica, her husband Jamie, and their two kids Brayton and Berkley, and I all went to the pumpkin fest today! It was alot of fun. I like seeing all the different things that people make. And not to mention the wonderful food!!! I ended up getting one medium sized pumpkin for me and Ben to carve once he gets home and three small pumpkins for us to paint. The third one is for my neice Sophie to paint! Erica ended up getting like six pumpkins. Two were gords but one pumpkin was freakin HUGE! It def. weighed more than me!

I know its short but just wanted to talk about my day!

OH... 3 more days and Ben comes home til Halloween!!! Im super excited!!!
{Brayton and Berkley}

Thursday, October 9, 2008

My Wonderful Husband

I must say that I have the most wonderful husband out there. And Im sure all of you are wondering what he did for me to say that but really he didnt do anything. I just love how no matter what I need to talk about he is always there to listen. He always makes me laugh, and everytime we are together we are always smiling at each other. Oh might I add that he is smoking hott and I cant keep my hands off! :)
Ben I want you to know that I love you more than anything. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me and I thank God everyday that you came into my life. I thought that I had experienced love once but then I met you. I didnt know what love was until then. I love how you always know how to cheer me up when I am feeling down. Sweetie I love you so much. I am going to miss you like crazy when you go over seas to fight for our country. I am so proud of you sweetie! I could never do what you do. You are truly my number one hero. I will always look up to you! My one wish is that when we have children that they look up to you and want to be just like their daddy! I love you so much! I can't wait to see you on Wednesday when you'll be home for 16 days!!! I miss you so much!! Love you babe!

Rascal loves you too!

[picture above is what i made at work today 10.9.08]

Sunday, October 5, 2008

Fatherly Love

Me and my dad used to be really close. Not so much anymore. I moved away when I got married and of course I cried a little because since my dad and stepmom had just gotten divorced I was afraid of what my dad was gonna do. Well I guess my dad took that as I was upset to leave. I was a little bit but once I started my life with Ben down in TN I didn't want to come back. Well I guess my dad thought that I would want to and when we got into our first fight I told him that the only reason I moved back was to finish my degree, which IS why I moved back. Apartently that hurt him. I dont know why he would think I would want to just leave my husband down in TN and move back in with him. Is he crazy? Well our first argument happend a few weeks ago. First you have to realize that we both are very stubborn and that he is an alcoholic and has an anger problem. Anywho we started arguing, I brought up his drinking, he brought up how I didnt really want to be here and yadda yadda. It all came down to him telling me to get out of his house. He ended up saying sorry the next day and obviously I stayed but I was still hurt. I pay him rent now each month and I pay for my own food. Well tonight I walk into the kitchen to get something to eat and I ask him a simple question about the hamburger and he starts jumping my case about how I never help around the house and how I dont take care of my dog. Im sorry but everytime I come home from working 12 hours a day or from school the dishes are already done and the house is already clean. His girlfriend does all of it. Im sorry that I dont do dishes after every meal like she does. I'll do them once a day but not after every freaking meal. And when it comes to my dog, I do take care of him. I love Rascal more than anything but when I work 12 hours a day I have to put him in his kennel or he will tear up stuff around the house. He isnt in there for 12 straight hours though. I call my grandmother who lives right up the street and ask to if she wouldnt mind coming down to the house and letting Rascal out for a little bit so that he can stretch his legs. I can't help the fact that I have to work, do my internship and have class also. Im freakin trying to graduate in December.
I guess I just dont know what to do anymore. I am not happy here but I dont want to go anywhere else but TN with Ben. And I cant leave because of class. I am only eight weeks from getting my degree. I dont want to throw away all of my hard work. I just wish that we could talk to one another and him not get mad and raise his voice and interupt me all the friggin time. He just gets so mad that I am afraid that he is going to hurt me. I just really dont want to be here anymore. I wish that January would hurry up and get here so that I can go and live with my friend Stacey far far away from here. I mean I love my dad dont get me wrong but ever since him and my stepmom split up he has been really weird. I know he is under alot of stress but that is no excuse to treat your daughter the way that you do. One thing that he said to me tonight was that Im not going to be a good mother and that me and Ben arnt going to make it. Who the heck does he think he is. There is one thing that me and Ben have done for three years and will continue to do until the day we die and that is to never go to bed angry. Yea we get into our arguments but who doesnt. At the end of the day I still love him more than life its self. My dad ended up taking it all back but it still hurt. I know that I will be a good mother to mine and Ben's children because I will not let them live the childhood that I did. I dont want my kids to have to go through that. And I KNOW that me and Ben are going to make it because we have both learned from each of our parents mistakes. It just ticks me off when people dont believe in us but I really dont care because all we are going to do is prove everyone wrong.
I just pray to God that me and my dad can get back the relationship that we used to have and that he gets help for all the things that he has wrong with him. aka drinking, anger, depression.
Dad, if you end up reading this(which you wont cuz you dont know how to work the computer) I just want you to know that I still love you. Just please, please let me life my own life!

Sunday, September 28, 2008

The things people think and make up

So.. all of this that I'm about to say cracks me up.
I used to be friends with this girl. We stopped being friends senior year in high school because she was jealous of my boyfriend who is know my husband. We started talking about 6 months ago. Just the average, "Hi how you doing? We should get together" type of thing. We never did get together though. Well in May she started dating my ex boyfriend, who I was still friends with. By the way, her and I were best friends when him and I were together. He ended up joining the Army and would call me and Ben and ask us questions about it if he needed too. When he left to go to basic training I did the courteous thing and told her that if she needed someone to talk to or needed any advice from someone that has gone though the same thing to give me a call. Well, we got to talking more, (on myspace) and she said that she missed our friendship and wanted to seriously get together and catch up when I moved back into town. I took her seriously and was willing to give our friendship another shot. In August when my ex graduated from BCT he ended up proposing to her. (Ben proposed to me that way :) lol) anyways.. I told her that if she wanted any help with the wedding or any advice that she was free to call if she wanted. I didn't really expect her to, I was just saying all of that to be nice. I had alot of people tell me that when I got engaged but I know that none of them really meant it. It's just the courteous thing to say. Apparently she thought that I was trying to take control of her and my ex's wedding and blah blah blah. I wasn't trying to do anything. I was still friends with my ex and had been for six years and I was close to his family, which still bothers her.
One thing led to another and now none of us talk which is fine with me but I just hate it when people tell lies about it all. I called my ex and told him that I wanted nothing to do with it anymore, told him EXACTLY what both her and I said and told him that I was ending it. All I was doing was being courteous and apparently that's a sin nowadays. We ended up talking about some other stuff, laughed and then I got off the phone. The next thing I know my ex cuts all ties with me, doesn't even talk to me over the Internet anymore because of her. Now she is going around telling people that I am unhappy in my marriage and I was requesting too much information and all this other crap. For one, I am the happiest I have ever been. I love Ben more than anything, and for your information me and (my ex) had been friends the whole time me and Ben have been together and it hasn't caused any trouble between us. He knows I'm not going to go and leave him, especially for (my ex). Also, it's fine if you want to tell him that he can't talk to me anymore and all that but I hope you realize that you can not choose his friends for him. If you think your marriage is going to work with you bossing him around and being immature and insecure you have another thing coming. I hate for this to sound so mean but I am sick and tired of you twisting everything I do and say around to make me look bad. I know the only reason you are doing it is to try to get his sister, who I am close with and have been for six years, against me. Here's a news flash, it's not going to happen. All you are doing is making yourself look even worse.
Another thing that had bothered her was that she heard that I said that I didn't think her and him should get married. Okay, for starters I didn't say that and IF I did why do you feel like you need my blessing to get married? YOU DON'T!!! But if you want it I will give it to you.
I guess I just don't understand why people that are insecure with their own relationship have to turn everything around and put the blame on someone else.

Sorry for all of that to be so intense.. I am just sick and tired of immature people. I wish that they would realize that I am not a bad person and all I was doing was being nice. But if they don't then it's their problem not mine. It just makes me laugh when I hear that she thinks that I am unhappy in my marriage. HAHAHAHA. You must be smoking crack if you think that. Ben is the best thing that has ever happened to me. Even though we are six hours away right now, I go to bed and wake up smiling just because I know that he is my husband. We have never been happier and it will always be like that. So please, get over yourself and start worrying about what color napkins you are going to have in your wedding!! :)

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

The Countdown Has Begun...

Ben had a pre deployment meeting on Thrusday 9.18.08. They talked to him about alot of different stuff. When he came home last weekend he brought me this big packet full of papers I have to read over and fill out. In these papers it talks about getting a will and a power of attorney. We knew we were going to do the power of attorney but we didnt expect to have to get a will. At first I was freaking out. I dont want to get a will and jinx the chance that my husband might not come back home to me. But the more and more I thought of it I realized that we need one anyways, whether he was going over or not, because if something were to happen to either one of us and we didnt have a will then the government would decide how to split up my life insurance and vise versa. Its really just alot to think of. I never thought this day would actually get here. And really its not even here yet. They have told him it could be anytime between Dec 1-10 and now they are saying December 16th. Part of me just wishes that he was already over so that way he could come home sooner. I cant believe that my best friend is going to be gone for a whole year. I am glad though, that I am going to have Stacey and Libby to keep my company
every night. Stacey's husband is going over with Ben so we decided it would help us out greatly if we lived together since we would both be going thru the same thing. I am very grateful to have her as a friend!
On a more happier note, as I had mentioned, Ben came home last weekend! He was an usher in his cousins wedding so he had to come home for that. We had been having problems with his cousin and her parents for quite some time now but I think her wedding put an end to it all. Me and Ben just didnt see things their way just like they didnt see things our way. I am really grateful that Kirk came up to Ben and talked to him and then came to me and talked to me. I hated the awkardness between all of us and so did Ben. We know that it wont ever be the same anymore between all of us but atleast we arnt arguing anymore. There are still some things that I will stand up for and put my foot down but I will deal with them when/if the time comes.

Well i'm gonna end this for now. I hope everyone has a good rest of the week and weekend!

{Pictured above: Mr. and Mrs. Luke Putnam}
{Ben, Me, Bens Grandparents and his dad}

{Mr. and Mrs. McHugh}

Monday, September 8, 2008

My weekend

This weekend was def something that I needed. Ben came home Friday night! I was so happy to see him and to hold him in my arms again. I needed it soo bad. We had a jam packed weekend. Saturday, after I got off work, we went to the mall and walked around for a bit, grabbed something to eat for lunch, went put put golfing, and then went down to the river and acted like photographers, we then went to the capital and finished taking pics. After that we went on a date to Applebees, our favorite restaurant, well atleast mine anyways! To finish off the night we went to Liz's bday party. We had so much fun together this weekend. We laughed like we did all summer long. It really makes me miss the summer when I was living with him. I pray everyday that time goes by really fast and he comes home safe to me from Afganistan so we can move back to TN and start the family that we always talk about.
Sunday we got up and went to his grandparents house for breakfast! It was yummy! lol Then we came back home and fell asleep. When we woke up Ben had to leave to go back. It was really hard watching him go but I knew there was nothing I could do about it. I cried, of course, but not like last night. I thought that last night and today would be hard like it was when I moved up here but I have kinda gotten used to being away from him again, like we had been for 2 years. Don't get me wrong, I miss him terribly but I am trying to stay strong, not only for me but for him too.
I do want to take a minute and thank all my friends for being so supportive and helpful while I have been home. It is not easy being away from Ben and no one knows what I am going thru but my friends sure do know how to make me laugh and still have a good time. Thank you guys so much for being there for me when I need to talk or not. You guys are amazing!
Below are some pics that we took this weekend. Some are edited with Photoshop!